Chicken..cluck cluck....

Ok..so I chickened out of going to get my blood work done.  I have to go to my ob's office and I feel dumb having to still go back there 5 months later.  So I made an appointment with my PCP.  They should really be the ones dealing with my thyroid issue since I am no longer preggos.  I also need them to set me up with an ultra sound for my gallbladder.  It's been KILLING me!!!  I need to have the one with the dye in it.  I had a regular one while pregnant but they couldn't see anything and recommended the dye once I gave birth.  This gallbladder has been bothering me for a few years.  I want it OUT!!!!

Ok...since I will not be going to the dr's today I MUST be productive today.  I have to go to the dermatologist tomorrow.  I joked with eric saying I wanted botox and fillers.  I said I'll come back looking plastic.  Actually, I'm going to have a nasty wart removed.  It's gross, but it's a stubborn little thing that keeps coming back!  I've had it removed so many times.  I'm also going to discuss some skin issues I've been having and have some freckles and spots looked at.  I'm VERY fair and it's rather annoying living like an old lady...but that's how I roll....dr's visits and lab work.  Such fun times...eyes rolling. 

I will never understand people and I shall leave it at that.

Ok, I have a screaming baby...off to do the mom stuff.

That's what she said...

Ok, so I have been busy this weekend. 

*** Things accomplished***

- Eric and I had a kid free dinner at le gallo rosso...it was yummy and I loved the old house the restaurant was in.  Great atmosphere along with yummy food!

- Bought and put flowers out by my mail box.  I cut the grass on Friday...my allergies about killed me afterward. 

- Cleaned the house.

- Eric made my sling...he's much better at a french seam

I'm in love with this fabric!!!  My sling has a black liner.  I love it.  We tweaked it from the first sling.  Made it a little more roomier.

- Finished painting the wall color for the bathroom.  Now all that is left is the trim and doors...which won't take long.  I need to order the wall decals and I need to buy new light fixtures along with all the bath accessories. 

- Totally used my mom skills to get spen to pull his front tooth.  It was dangling and super nasty looking so I told him front teeth are worth 10 bucks and you get an extra 2 bucks if you pull it out yourself. He about yanked that tooth out of his own head.  He wanted a new game.  It's getting harder to be the tooth fairy, Easter bunny, and Santa Claus...I should totally put that on a job application.  These jobs are hard...esp with each year having to be more creative and out do the last year.


I'm super excited about kinda vamping up my formal living room...Here's my inspiration...

I have no idea where I can score these curtains...I think I might be able to sew trim on the sides of white ones.

I MUST work out this week...I've ate so much this weekend.

I can't believe my little boy will be 7 this week.  It seems he was just a toddler the other day.  I love spen so much.  I hope he has a good birthday.  Ok...off to do more house work I go.

Psssttttt....

I heard a rumor about me...my ass looks fabulous in my old prepregnancy jeans...spread the word....

Ok....today...so much to do....so much to do.  I have a date night with the hubs...long over due...and I need to go to lowes.  I want to get some flowers for my planter by my mail box.

I'm sleeppppppyyyyy....but off to start the day I go....

Busy busy busy....

So today I had to play the Easter bunny and go shopping for the kids.  I scored a swing for outside for Cedric.  I'm going to use that as his easter basket.  I got spen some books, clothes a really cool pop up book kit, candy and some little toys.  I still have to get his b-day stuff.  But I did get his room decorations.  I always decorate his room while he is asleep and then he is all excited when he wakes up. 

I need to buy a grocery cart cover.  Cedric can now sit up (assisted) so he would enjoy being able to see things.  I also need to sew my sling.  Grrrrrr...I swear this weekend it shall be done!  I need to buy a backpack to replace my diaper bag.  It will be much more efficient than a diaper bag.

I'm sleepy...but totally excited for date night tomorrow!!!  I need to make dinner reservations.  We haven't been out without the kids in forever.  I'm a nerd but I miss my hubby.  I love him to pieces. I think we are going to go the roller derby girl thing and also hit up Le Gallo Rosso.  I have only been there to shoot pics of food but the atmosphere looks romantic and fun.  Amanda loves it...so Eric and I shall give it a try.  Ok off to pick spen up from school.

Sleeeeppppppyyyyy.....

I need to clean today.  My house has left the untidy description and entered into the house on cops that was busted for meth description.  Ok...maybe not that bad.  But I have so many projects I should be doing and things I need to finish, including laundry but here I sit instead.  Oh well.

I need to have a smidge of coffee.  My gallbladder has been killing me lately and caffeine sets it off.  But I need caffeine to merely survive.

I love my hubby.  He surprised me with a book I have been wanting.  He stopped by borders on the way home from work yesterday.  I love when he does little things like that : )   Makes me feel loved.

Ok..enough mush mouth stuff.  I have started walking away my pounds...or so I hope.  I walked so much yesterday...I have no idea how far or long I walked.  But hopefully it will get me back to skinny.

oh beautiful sleep....my bed is calling me...maybe cedric and I will crawl in bed for a little nap in the am.

A beautiful day....

We went for a walk today in Anchorage.  I love how they remodeled it.  We did not walk the whole trail because we were losing light, but we will soon.  I think this is going to become my little walking spot.  I like it...you have the outdoor woodsy feeling, but in the middle of town.

Cedric is officially teething.  I literally had to hold him ALL night.  My arms and body were so stiff this morning.  I love my hubby...he got up throughout the night to help Cedric and me.  Poor little guy was in so much pain.

I scored the shark teething hoodie.  He looks adorable in it.

I also got the boys their Easter clothes.  I need to do pictures and take Cedric to see the Easter bunny. Grrrrrr.....

Ok...while talking to a friend I just remembered my love for V.C. Andrews...awwwww...the joys of my weird youth.  I think all chicks went through a V.C. Andrews phase.  I swear I read all the books twice over.  I loved them.  Now looking back, they all had the same story plot and set of events...incest, baby snatching and rape along with love and money. Made for an interesting innocent youth read.

I've been thinking about things lately and how life unfolds before us with a set of choices.  Often time we have to make decisions on our feelings and how we react to certain events.  I will never understand why people are the way they are, nor fully grasp why they choose to do the things they do.  That is merely the path in their journey they have chosen and one I choose not to follow behind.  I will not fill my heart with hatred or be mean to people.  I welcome people into my life with open arms and greet everyone as I would want to be greeted. I'm really digging this positive thinking mumbo jumbo.  

Ok, off to snuggle with the hubs.  I missed him today terribly.  We need to have a date night.  It's been months since we've gone out alone.  Maybe I can get a babysitter this weekend and have some good food and a little roller derby on the side : )

I love being a mom....

Today is one of those days when your kids smile melts your heart and makes everything else in the world not seem to matter.  Spencer was his adorable self at breakfast.  I could not kiss him enough today and Cedric is his wonderful morning baby.  He's all smiles and laughs. He's melting my heart.  Of all the jobs I've had in my lifetime...and there have been a lot...I'm kinda a gypsy in that respect, being a mother is the best one so far.  I love it!!!  It's only amplified by the fact I have a wonderful partner.  Eric is an awesome dad...and hubby.  I'm blessed.  We talked this morning and we are going to start hiking.  Woo hoo...I'm sooo stoked.  I love hiking...before the heat sets in that is.  Actually, it's cooler in the woods when it's hot outside.  I want to start soon.  We need to get a baby backpack.  I'm weird and get excited over stuff like this.  I'm a princess in the city and a princess mountain woman out in the woods.  I can remember camping and applying makeup...it's kinda funny looking back.

Cedric is playing with his voice...aka...screaming.  It's adorable.

I have so much to do today...grrrrrrrrrr....I want to buy some flowers for my front planters.  But I'll just kill them:(  I suck at real plants.

It's funny, Eric is opening up to the idea of having another kid.  We were both on the fence a while back.  But Eric was actually thinking about it and throwing the idea around the other day.  I don't know if I want to carry the next time or adopt.  We both want to adopt...so maybe that will be the avenue we choose.  I love my husband.  He is the most loving and understanding men I know.  I love how his heart bleeds for the kids out there without parents.  I could see us being foster parents once our kids are older.  I hate quiet houses.  Homes are meant to have children running about them.

Ok...enough mush mouth fool nonesense...I must start the day and go shopping...

Finally...time to sit still....

I have ran all day today.  I went to joanns fabric, hobby lobby, the bank and home depot. Geesssshhhhh...not to mention as soon as I did get home I fed the baby and finished painting around my front door.  It's finally done.  I scored some perfect fabric today for my garbage bag holder.  I couldn't find numbers I liked for the outside of my house.  So I decided to just put my address on the mailbox.  I feel naked right now because my house doesn't have any big numbers telling others it's address...weird I know. 

Speaking of mail boxes...how do you politely tell someone they put their new lovely mailbox in YOUR YARD!  Yes, my new neighbors did that.  I don't want to get into a tiff so I have a plan...hopefully it will work.

Ok, I have been bombarded in the news...celebrity gossip news...the only news I really follow...with so many people cheating on their spouses.  WTF?  Really, they're famous...do they really think they will not be found out?  I'm amazed how many people cheat on their spouses in regular boring life.  I don't get that either.  The grass is never greener on the other side...usually when you get over there you discover it's AstroTurf and you were a fool to think other wise. 

ok...I need to go shower...I feel gross and smell probably like an old sea captain...I've been painting all evening.  EEEkkkk...

 

Ewwwwwwwwww......

Where is the sun???

I was promised sun today and dammit I want it!!!!  

I have been so freaking productive this week I am astonished!  I kicked this houses butt yesterday.  I met with a client...scored another wedding!  I washed the jeep, went to the grocery, put an ad out, not to mention actually got sleep last night.  We took spen out to the Irish Rover for a pre-paddy's day celebration.  I was not about to fight the crowds today.  Enjoyed good food and came home got spen in bed and crashed.  I swear I was out cold.  My lovely hubby took care of the baby.  He fed him, and got him ready for bed.  He's such a good dad.  I on the other hand enjoyed my night of slumber. 

I need to paint the frame around my front door today...funnnnnnn...eyes rolling.  It's to that point that it has to be painted.  My kid is dressed like a white trash baby...milk on his face, and no pants.  Lovely. 

I swear this is how I feel.  I use grocery bags to put diapers in.  They work on keeping down the smell.  Well, I am becoming over loaded with them. So this week I'm going to make a holder for them to hang on Ceddy's changing table.  I need to go pick up some fabric and new thread.  Ok...off to start the day.  I'm in a weird chipper mood...I guess it's that mysterious thing called sleep.

Hurry hurry...

I'm in such a rush today....I need to sit still for a mere second.  I've been up and running since I woke up.  Two cups of coffee and off I went.  I have to meet with a client today.  I have some much still to do.   I need to wash clothes...grrrrr...I hate this chore. 

I still need to get Easter stuff and Easter clothes for the kids. 

I'm kinda bummed about some stuff.  This house has so many things that we have to do to it.  It's reaching that age when a lot of things need to be replaced...ie, WINDOWS!  Ouch.  Those cost a pretty penny.  I think we might buy one at a time.  I don't want to aquire more debt.  I also need to start painting the trim outside.  I DESPISE this task!!!   But it needs to be done.  It's mere maintenance.  It just sucks monkey balls.  Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....thank God I have a hubby that will help.

I got spens party invites.  I need to send them out.  I think we have decided on gerbils for him.  His head will explode with excitement.  He's funny.

This weekend is state championship for chess.  We will be going.

Ok...wasted enough time...back to the house hold grind.

Progress....

Ok, Eric and I played around most of the weekend and really did not get all that we set out to do done.  But I'm cool with that... spen's closet organizer is up..woo hoo!!!  The cars have oil changes and new fluids so it was a productive weekend nonetheless.  I love spens new closet organizer.  We need to put one in Ceddys room next.  We are going to redo our closet all together and put in nice built-ins.  When, I have no clue.  Money is the factor and we have A LOT of other pressing household demands.  I even bought spen a little tie and belt holder.  It's low enough for him to reach.  He's good at keeping organized.  He just has to have a space to put the items.  He's a creature of habit, so it won't take him long to get used to and use his closet properly.

We have been trying to recycle more lately.  I hate how much plastic and other products we consume.  We have been taking them to the recycle bin.  I'm excited (yes, I realize how lame I am) but I'm stoked on my new reusable coffee filter.  It "supposed" to last 5 years...we shall see.  But I won't be wasting extra paper a day : )  This is a nice plus.

Eric is at the doctor and I hate I'm not with him.  We usually always go with each other, but his appointment was at 8:30 and spens school doesn't start until 9:05...so I couldn't go.  But he's been having some hearing issues.  I hope all is ok.  I emailed him and he hasn't responded so who knows.

I need to start buying the boys some spring clothes.  Both boys are growing like a weed...I have no idea what I will do when they are teenagers.  Good Lord, they will eat me out of house and home.

The wrong part of me...

-how wrong is it that I...

-am a photographer and yet have empty frames around my house?
-stopped working out expecting my weight to magically fall off.
-just now realized it won't
-never cook
-really needs to finish my kids bathroom, but am afraid to use the steamer next to the outlets...so I'm leaving it up for Eric to do.  (electricity scares me)
-never go down in my basement, and I have three rooms down there including a theater room.  I'd rather watch a movie in my bedroom.
-refuse to buy any new clothes until I'm skinny, but will justify new sandals.  They will fit when I reach my goal weight.
-have an unhealthy addiction to target.  I won't allow myself to go in there if I can't spend money.
-just now realized how many freaking calories are in my coffees daily...and I have about 3-4 cups a day...ouch!
-have yet to take ceddy's pics in awhile...I'm talking studio pics.
-sit in my office daily and yet have no desire to clean it. (it's stock piled with junk mail)
-I have a shredder and NEVER use it.  I hate how slow it is.
-I don't recycle all that I should.  I try, but not hard enough.
-don't take care of myself as well as I should.
-I can be mean to the people I love the most.
-I was mad at Eric so I scheduled his doctor appointment at 8:30 am, (he hates mornings as bad as I do)and wish I hadn't because I really need to go with him and can't.
-I really wish I could run a mini marathon, but expect to be instantly in shape after a few days of training.
-I don't stand up to people like I should and many times pretend not to hear, nor see things that piss me off in the attempt to be "nice"
-I hate being nice!
-I really want to volunteer, but I really do not have the time....and that sucks.
-I cry easily about dumb things.
-I love crappy music.
-I don't like twilight.  I'm a chick isn't this some prerequisite for having ovaries? 
-I wish I lived in NYC.
-I probably need medicine for my ADHD, but I think it makes me quirky and more artistic.
-I hate I suck at sewing.
-I hate I never paint anymore.
-I forget EVERYTHING unless I practice it.
-I wish I could sing...I suck and sound as if a cat were dying.  But this does not keep me from giving private concerts in my car daily to my kids.
-I need to fill out my kids baby books more...but really will they care...probably not.
-I'm terrified to fly.
-once in my art fag phase I drank a whole bottle of wine, and ate pineapple cupcakes while watching hamlet.  Needless to say wine and pineapple cupcakes still turn my stomach to this day.
-I am a funny drunk.
-I love to read but never do.
-I suck at swimming.
-I HATE fishing.


ok...this is boring.  I have so much to do today.  I've made myself a workout routine.  I know how lazy I am...so I have to split things up.  I'm starting off easy so I won't get burned out.  I'm including things I can do around the house.  My goal is to start walking everyday...today is out because of the weather : (  But I will run up and down my steps to cover the walk.  Ok...off to weigh in and workout!

Easy peasy...

I'm excited...Ceddy's shirts turned out cute today. I have another iron on to do, but I only bought a two pack of onesies.  I've been busy lately...spen has been sick, I've been cleaning and catching up on laundry along with attempting to organize spens closet.  I need Eric to help me.  I want to put some shelves up he can actually reach and use. 

I need to get the boys pics done and buy them easter outfits.  So much to do!!!

Ok off to make dinner.

So much to do...

Here I sit...with so many things to do...

Oh...just finish/start 4 spider costumes.  I do have a great mom who made my bee costumes.

Update my site...including new packages...oh and think up these packages.  That would help.

Work out like a crazy woman.  I hate being fat.

Email some clients back.

Clean my basement and bedroom.  I kicked this houses ass yesterday. 

and so much more stuff it depresses me just thinking about it...so I won't.

I'm going out to lunch with some friends who I haven't seen in FOREVER.  I'm excited about that.  Then I'm going to swing by and pick up another friend.  Went to a jewelry party last night.  Had fun, but Cedric kept me busy.  Eric had to take spen to scouts so Ceddy had to come with me.  He was quite entertaining.  I felt bad for the woman who sold the jewelry...Ceddy was kinda interrupting her spill.  I did take him out of the room...but I still feel bad.  My friend and I met up with the guys at Marks and I of course ate my weight in bbq and fries.  Soooo not on my diet.  I feel guilty.  But it was yummy and so I'm over it.

Pinewood derby this weekend...hummmmm....hopefully spen does well.  I'm so excited it's pretty out.  I'm going to start walking with Sarah and Lauren.  Hopefully, I'll walk off some of this weight. 

I have a very busy week next week.  Spens play, derm appointment, dentist appointment, and get blood work done.  Fun stuff.

Ok...off to get dressed and

It's a pity party everyones invited...

Ok Eric is working this weekend and next.  His work is yet again implementing a new system.  Blah blah blah...all I know is he works extremely hard for that company and he should be handsomely rewarded for his efforts.  But anyhoo....I'm bummed I have to have a weekend without him.  He's in Louisville just tied to his computer somewhere in nerdville.

Let the pity party begin...........

- I scored some awesome fabric for bibs...I love the blue cupcake fabric..it's blue so it's boyish....and the damask is really pretty.  One problem...I suck at sewing.  I'm the chick who used stitch witch for curtains.  I'm super bummed because I tried to sew today and royally fudged up...so now I have to wait for hubby to get home and fix my machine.  Yes, my husband sews better than me.

- I need a break,  I'm about to lose my ever lovin mind!!!!

The baby is up...short lived nap...off I go.

Food for thought...

Have you ever saw yourself on video or in a picture and thought...holy hell I'm fat.  What the hell happened to me?  Yeah...I had one of those moments today...Just when I thought I was doing good with my diet...I was yet again reminded how much weight I have gained....ok pointeless note...carry on....

I must....

- go to the grocery....I'm out of everything :(
- Get dressed...I'm sitting here in a bra and sweat pants because I was painting the boys bathroom and ceddy was not having any of that...so mom to the rescue... painting shirt had to come off to hold a screaming baby...
- finish painting the boys bathroom.  somehow....
-decide what new color to paint my bath and possible bedroom....eric will love this idea...eyes rolling
- make my sling...poor sewing project I have not forgotten about you.
- make a new craft project...thanks to the goddess martha stewart...head bows, an adorable mobile I plan on making ceddy.

I plan on making it more boyish...with different colors and no flowers.  Well, see.
- clean...everything and anything in my house..period.
-at some point i need to clean the fridge and the microwave....maybe when hell freezes over.

I'm giggly nervous...my new bedding comes in tomorrow.  I have no idea what it looks like in person...there was no reviews online about it.  So fingers crossed it's not too ugly.  Our bedroom needs a drastic makeover.  As does my hair.

I'm down another half pound.  I have 28.5 pounds to get to my goal weight.  Wish me luck.  I need to really start working out.  Sitting in bed watching tv lifting 2 pound weights really doesn't count.  ha!

New must have.....

Pink cupcake rainboots...need I say more???

Yesterday in picture form....

Yesterday was a gorgeous day out so we took a walk around the neighborhood.  It was so nice to be able to be outside and see the sun.  I hope this weather last!!!  My Easter lilies are starting to come up even surrounded by snow.

I look horrific, no makeup and a wacky ponytail with Eric's hoodie, oh well.  My boys look cute...Ceddy was amazed by whatever he was seeing from his stroller and Spen was being silly throwing snowballs and stepping in the mud. 

 

The lovely tire mark I left in my yard right before the snow.  I think the snow only amplified it's ugliness and made it worse.  I do this every year...you would think I would know where my driveway ends and begins...durrrrrr Below is a cute sign I saw on someones door...I think it's sweet.

Self awareness...

Self awareness is a foreign concept to some people, but at some point one must wake up to their life look around and realize they have a hand in some of the outcomes laying before them.  Who you surround your self with, the negative thoughts that run through your mind, and the decisions that you make everyday no matter how minuet they may seem all dictate your life.  I'm not speaking of people inflicted with illness, disease, or death...but the simple people who whine and complain that life sucks simply need to step up and take control of their life.  if you surround yourself with losers, negative thinkers or mere jerkfaces then at some point that will creep in.  Sounds all like common sense to me...but most people lack it.

I normally do not comment about my political or religious views on here, but something has really been bothering me.  How certain "super christian" people do not realize that anything that consumes you, anything that you obsess over, anything that is too much..is exactly that.  I know a few people like that.  I think a lot of times these people are followers clinging to a life they need to live to feel justified.  They need to feel like they are living for a cause. They need to belong with other people.  These are often the people who fear what others think and secretly contemplate are they "christian enough" behind closed doors. It's funny to me because they really don't see how they are so similar to the people they condemn to hell.  Too much of anything is a bad thing.  When does it stop becoming a religion and start becoming an obsession is an important question these individuals need to ask themselves.  Not every book you read has to be devoted to God.  Not every movie nor every blog entry or update must pertain to the God.  It's kinda depressing how they belittle God, they think they must dedicate every aspect of their lives to God, but lack the true understanding of him.  He created you, and I'm sure he would want you to enjoy the life he has given you.  I highly doubt God is a narcissistic creator as many Christians lead others to believe.  He is understanding and all loving.  It blows my mind how so many christians cannot grasp that.  They speak of his love, and grace, but have no clue to what it truly means.  They walk around trying to be perfect when in their hearts know no one is.  I believe God has a sense of humor.  It would only make sense if it is a characteristic that we have...he would share.

Another aspect of Christianity that annoys me is the judging.  Who are we to judge another?  I mean really, who's right is it to judge another persons sexuality, lifestyle or beliefs.  If God created a person, I'm sure he made them the way they are for a reason.  There are few times I feel is it ok to discuss a persons life in judgment....and that is when children are involved or abuse is occurring.  I have no patience for abusers and people who simply are selfish.  That has nothing to do with religious views, but rather simple respect of fellow humans.  Being selfish and choosing to abuse is not a personal right or "the way someone was born", it's choosing to make that decision and following through with your actions.

I hate claiming my religion as christian because often times I'm lumped into the large amount of cruel judgmental christians that have no real concept of Christianity.  These people simply want to belong to a club, they want to be the norm and jump on whatever bandwagon that is socially acceptable that day.  I know I'm not perfect, I know that I make stupid decisions, I know I like to cuss, I like to laugh and most of all I am not politically correct and have a dark sided sense of humor, but God made me this way : )  So I will not purge myself from my feelings, emotions nor will I turn my back from my gay friends, friends who are atheists or strangers with different lifestyles or beliefs.  To me Christianity is Christ like and Jesus was a hippie who hung out with the whores, thieves and basically a lot of the rejects of the day.  Forcing your views down others throats is not the "christian" thing to do, but simply rude thing to do.  Live by example, be a good person and let others see how good you truly are by your actions.

Me personally I believe there are different paths to God.  I think it's arrogant to believe otherwise and that any one religion is the "only " way.  I'm a christian because this is how I was raised and the path I have chosen.  But I will never knock down Judaism, Muslim, or Buddhism.  Any religion for that matter. ( Besides Scientology...sorry tom cruise..you're nuts..ha! )  But whatever works for you is your choice, God created you and he knows what you are attracted to and what works for you.  I've had atheists friends tell me if God created me with a scientific mind then he should know why I don't believe.  I support that 100%.  He is understanding...and like all the lovely oooober christians sing loud everyday ...God makes no mistakes.  Now they need to see that this pertains to all aspects, not just the ones that coordinate with what they agree with.

Also, I find it hilarious how some people are mislead that people do not market christianity.  They sell t-shirts, bumper stickers, hell even figurines.  Have you had the chance to visit Gatlinburg?  That place is full of the marketing of Christ.  I think it's funny how all the white people have this iconic image of Jesus with flowing blondish hair with blue eyes, tan and handsome.  Hummm....he was a jew from the middle east people and he looked like one.
Ok...since it is sunday I've had my religious experience for the day : )  Ha!  Today I have a long day filled with  house work and painting.  I also need to tackle spens homework project and decide what costumes I'm going to make for his play at school.  Off to start the day I go.......